Let Your Tithes Be Your Testimony

On January 25, 2012, I was fired from my first job in social work.  Although I went through many financial trials, being released from that job was a blessing.  I no longer had to worry about planning my day around my job from wake to sleep, long hours of travel, and being on call 24 hours amongst other things.  It took awhile for me to get hired for any position but toward the end of March 2012, I was hired as a PRN mental health tech making a fraction of what I made working for the previous employer. At times, it seemed like this job paid me just enough to buy gas to get to work and food - not much else.  The time I spent unemployed and underemployed gave me time to myself.  I went through days of boredom, defeat, and just plain depression.  I also was able to get down low enough to look up at God. My thirst for the Word was greater than ever and at this point, I had time to study the bible.  In July 2012, I started attending a new church as a visitor.  I was drawn to the church and it seemed to give me just what I needed spiritually.

Having grown up in the church, I knew the entire situation shouldn't have rocked me because my  faith should have been at a level where I just trusted God and kept on moving.  Many days this wasn't the case though.  I suffered with a wavering faith that eventually grew stronger. I was more the Word, excited about church and I could actually see growth in myself.   I even spend a lot of time watching the archives of lifechurch.tv which really a Godsend.  After the watch meeting was over and 2013 had rolled around, I officially moved my membership to that church.

I know you're probably wondering by now what tithes has to do with anything I've said so far. Here's how it ties in:  When I was working the decent paying job, I payed tithes - inconsistently and after taxes.  When I started working PRN,  I was grateful to have a job again so I paid tithes BUT "when I could".  I eventually made up in my mind that paying my tithes was going to have to become a habit - not an option or an afterthought.  I did pretty well, eventually moving from sometimes to most of the time and from tithing on post tax income to tithing on pretax income (I don't want God to take taxes out of my blessings).  I was of the mindset that if no one else got paid, my tithes would get paid.  As I paid my tithes more consistently at the church I was a member of at the time, I was also visiting my current church more frequently.  It was amazing how every time I wrote out my tithes envelop at my membership church, I would think about how much more useful the money would be at the church I had started attending.  I knew in my heart that it was time for me to move my membership and my money.  I knew that my money needed to be contributed to the household of faith where I was being fed.  I've done well with tithing this year, even really making my tithes first - making sure to set my tithe money aside before spending money on anything else.  I've done well, actually up until the last month and a half and I think I've gone through a financial faith crisis.  A trying course of events took place in my life requiring me to have to travel and spend money that I really didn't have.  I would look at my check from my full time job as a ward clerk (same employer and pay rate of the PRN position) and think, "I'll have to pay my tithes the next time.  This isn't going to be enough to take care of everything".  All the while, God has continually been blessing me. I guess he's been releasing those stored up blessings when I most needed them. Even though my faith was there for healing of my family member, provision, and other things in the spiritual, I got back to the point where I didn't trust God with "my money".  That's so crazy because people were calling me to give me money so I would have gas and even when I would be at my last, something would come in the mail or I would run out just as payday made it.  God proved himself over and over but I still wasn't doing my part.  He is so amazingly good that he blessed me to be moved to a position in the field I actually went to college for with better conditions and pay than the job that fired me.  Just as my patience was running out and I thought I was sitting still too long, He moved for me.  I found myself wanting to tell one of my spiritual leaders about my upcoming transfer with the boost of favor that was given to me but I was quieted.  It overcame me that I need to let my tithes be my testimony.

You may be wondering what I mean by calling tithes a testimony.  Well, we often tell people how good God is.  We brag on our blessings or as many say "boast in Jesus" but when it comes down giving back to God what He gives to us, we can't brag.  Letting my tithes become my financial testimony is a personal commitment.  It says, God gave me this job and I'm giving back to Him what He requires of me.  It says that when I was once only able to pay this much, God increased my income so now I pay this much.  It says that no matter how rough I think times are, I have to stay committed to doing what is required of me.  This experience and this blog should be my reminder that the next time I consider not paying my tithes, I should re-evaluate my thinking because God has always done for me even when I didn't deserve it so I must always give Him HIS DUE.

Is There a Plank In Your Eye?

Just a few days ago, I decided to use the audio feature on my bible app because my eyes had gotten heavy and I wanted to finish the last few chapters of Ezekiel. To my surprise, the feature made reading along so much easier. I started out about to fall asleep. I ended up starting on the book of Matthew and I've been reading along or just simply listening to the audio feature ever since.
I fell asleep last night and the audio feature just kept playing so I didn't stop it. As I was getting dressed for work, I listened to the bible. And there it was, I was preaching to myself! Matthew 7: 1-5 really got my attention. 1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

3 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. The words of Jesus are pretty clear. We can't judge issues of others when we are not dealing with our own. I started thinking about various scenarios in which this verse could be used. I'm sure you may be already thinking of some yourself or once you read these you'll be able to add to the list. 

• How can you tell me that my drinking is out of control when every time I pour up you pour up?
• Did you really just tell me I need to get in the gym and lose weight? Don't you weigh just as much as I do (or more)? When was the last time you were in the gym? 
• Go to church? You complain about your church constantly. How can you expect me to be excited about going somewhere you don't even like to go?
• Did you just tell me I need to spend more time studying than having fun when you are always rushing to get your homework done right before class starts?
• Every time I talk to you and your children are around, you're hollering at them and threatening to beat them, but you want me to be gentle with my kids.
• You call me a weed head but you bought the cigars when it was time to roll up. 
• How can you sit here and call me judgmental? You talk about people more than I do. 
• There is no relationship advice I could possibly take from you. You can't possibly be doing any of the things you're advising me to you because your relationship is in shambles.
• You can't judge me for going out to the club. You spend all your time at the casino!

All of these scenarios came to me to say this: If you feel like you need to go talk to someone about something you feel like they're doing wrong or you're concerned for their well-being, imagine that person's possible reactions when you try to remove their "sawdust". If you've got a "plank", you need to start working on you first. Your "plank" may just be the reason for their "sawdust" in the first place. 

The song "Sweep Around" by The Williams Brothers comes to mind. I hope you've enjoyed. Let's be careful to look for "planks" before we point out "sawdust"!